Falling Into Wonderland (Wait! I'm not Alice, so where are we?)
by Emma Vance
Summary: This is NOT an Alice in Wonderland fic, so you'll have to read the first chapter- which is the introduction to get all the facts you need, since I don't want to spoil it all in the summary. Rated M, for possible fantasy violence (?), language, yaoi in later chapters, possible ruining of a fairy tales, sarcasm, and the works. If you dislike yaoi and such, stay away!
1. Down the rabbit hole, into the cinders

**Ever since I was little I've always loved fairy tales, but I've long since grown out of the crap that Disney has spun for us (not that I don't like Disney, but still-). I realized that Disney twists The Brothers Grimm, Hans Christian Anderson, and such to fit their children viewers. And with them it's all the prince saving the princess, boy falls in love with girl, and they all live happily ever after.**

**Sooner rather than later I realized that I preferred stories in which the characters have to jump through hoops of fire to reach their destination and the ones that they love- and the love doesn't always work out. I found that having the characters almost die two or three or eight times along the way made for a more interesting story and plot line, and those created by our lovely, four, evil, Japanese mangaka were the best.**

**I also found that I preferred a boy saving a boy, or both of them go off together on an adventure to do. . . something, and find their love on the way. it might just be the musings of a silly, young girl, but by the fact that your reading this then you must agree with me at least a little bit.**

**Because, I mean, come on! Who reads this stuff if it they don't like it?**

**Warning: Swearing, yaoi in later chapters, misled plot by just a little bit, probably ruining your fairy tales, sarcasm on my part, so on and so forth.**

**Disclaimer: I just own the plot not the characters. Although I reallllllly want the characters, and if anyone can contact CLAMP and get them to sell them to me, tell me.**

**And if anyone has read the new update of Drug & Drop- holy crap, what is up with that! I want the next chapter!**

**Read, review, and fangirl on!**

**By the way- the real name of the story is _Falling Into Wonderland (Oh, wait! I'm not Alice, so where the hell are we?) _but they wouldn't let me write all of that in the title. though most of the time I refer to it as FIW._  
_**

Once upon a time in a world called London, well, rather London was a city in the greater scheme of things, there lived a boy named Alice. But for the sake of our story, lets call him Kazahaya. Anyway, Kazahaya had and elder sister by the name of Kei, and Kei had just finished a relaxing morning of reading aloud that Kazahaya had found incredibly boring and had wholeheartedly ignored. Now passing into that early afternoon- shortly after twelve o' clock pm and long before tea time, Kazahaya was taking a stroll in the gardens to shake off some of the early morn fatigue and came across a rabbit. Now a rabbit is not uncommon to see in such a place as a garden seeing as they like to eat the flowers and generally make their homes there, but Kazahaya noted that there was something very peculiar about this rabbit. Peculiar as such as it was wearing a black uniform, carried a watch, wore glasses, and was all around muttering about dinner preparations, alcohol intake, and being held up and now late by some 'jerk'.

Kazahaya, feeling some otherworldly force guiding him, set off after the rabbit and quickly found himself tripping over a conveniently placed rock, into a conveniently placed hole, which probably led to a conveniently placed abyss- which is where Kazahaya's spirits were currently residing with this new turn of events. Now Kazahaya had always been a very practical boy- he looked both ways before he crossed the street, but he had failed to see the danger in a white rabbit muttering to itsel. . .

Wait, wait, wait! Hold up a second! This is the WRONG bloody story! I mean, LOOK at the title: _Falling Into Wonderland (Oh, wait! I'm not Alice, so where the hell are we?)_ NOT Alice- so clearly this is NOT an Alice in Wonderland story. In all truth, this is a Cinderella story- meaning there are NO dark mysterious holes, and NO handsome men _with_ guns and bunny ears. It's just NOT a part of the plot! So lets get back on track, shall we?

Ahem. . . Once upon a time, in a kingdom way farther away than most, lives a king and his son- the prince. Now the prince has a name, and well, so does the king, but seeing as the prince is a main character in the midst of this plot it's probably better to introduce him first. As for his name well, against the whole Disney 'Prince Charming' thing- it's Rikuo.

And in this kingdom there also lived a beautiful, effeminate boy named Kazahaya- who was sometimes known as 'Cinderella', but that was for reasons unknown seeing as he lived a very comfortable life with his Step'mother', Stepfather, 'Evil' Stepsister #1, 'Evil' Step'sister' #2, and was only called that by bratty children in the village that as a consequence got punched on the head by an angry Kazahaya whenever they called him Cinderella within his earshot.

Anyway, the prince. . . Rikuo was nearing his eighteenth birthday, and although he felt no pressure from his father to pick a bride (his father knowing before him which way he swung), he felt an almost overwhelming sense of urgency for it from the rest of the kingdom.

And this, my dear readers, is where the story. . . the REAL story begins. . . (Alice in Wonderland not included)

**Yeah, that was just the introduction, we'll get to the actual story-line in the next chapter, thank you for your patience. Reviews are always welcome!**


	2. Where the story really begins

**"Hi guys! Em here, along with Kazahaya! Kaza, say hi!"**

**"No! Why can't this be an Alice in Wonderland story? That way I could at least be a hero and fight the evil red queen!"**

***sighing* "We've been over this before, it's because if I did that I wouldn't have anywhere to put Rikuo, 'cause Yûko would have to be the red queen."**

**"Then Why do I have to be Cinderella?!"**

***straightforward* "Because Rikuo makes a better prince and I can put you in a dress."**

***Mouth opens, huts, then opens again* ". . ."**

**"All arguments are rendered invalid, because I can put Kazahaya in a dress. I hope you enjoy this next installment of FIW!"**

**Warning: Swearing and gay vibes, but other than that you're good. . . for now.**

**Disclaimer: The plot is mine, the characters are CLAMPS, I really want to update with Drug & Drop, but other than that nothing out of the ordinary.**

**Kazahaya's POV**

"Kakei-san!" I yell tromping down the stairs- missing my shirt and my hair mussed on one side from where my siblings had made a grab for it when trying to force me into one of their new dress creations.

"Yes, Kazahaya-kun? And I'd really prefer that you call me mother." Kakei calls from the kitchen and I stomp into there. Running into Saiga as I went. He snickered at me and then passed by. I scowl and cross into the room.

"They've tried to dress me up again!" I complain.

Kakei looks at me, "Yes. Yes they did."

"You told me that you'd make them stop!"

"Did I?" Kakei tilts his head in mock confusion, "Well even if I did it doesn't matter."

"It does to me!" I growl and then flinch as one of my siblings seemingly falls on me- arms going around my neck from my back in a lazy manour.

"Come'on Kazhaya-kun." Himawari-chan says.

"We were just having some fun! And you're much more fun to dress up than I am- I only look good in furisodes." Fai-kun says coming up behind her.

"I seriously doubt that," I mutter, losing any ground that I might have on them by the second.

Now I should probably explain, shouldn't I?

My name is Kazahaya Kudo. I was born to my parents along with my twin sister, but soon after our fifth birthday our mother died. When we were eight our father discovered that he was interested in the same sex and got married to Kakei-san, who in turn had two adopted children- Himawari-chan and Fai-kun. Then, when we were eleven our father died and we continued to live with Kakei-san. _Then_ when we were thirteen Kakei-san got re-married to Saiga-san and he's lived with us here. So now I have a step'mother', stepfather, and two step siblings that insist on dressing me up!

I open my mouth to say more when a knock at the door distracts me.

"Himawari, could you please fetch the door and let poor Watanuki-kun in?" Kakei asks.

"Yes, of course." Himwari smiles and disappears. Fai gives a happy yelp and flies upstairs where- no doubt- he's grabbing a letter for Watanuki-kun to deliver.

I don't question Kakei's guess of 'Watanuki' because I've long since found out that he's always, by some magic, right.

"Thank you Himawari-chan~!" Watanuki's dopey voice comes floating into the kitchen as Himawari leads him back. Not that I dislike Watanuki-kun, in fact, we get along quite well, it's just that every time that he see's Himawari-chan his head floats into the clouds.

"Hello Watanuki-kun," Kakei says cheerfully, "Any news for us this evening?"

Watanuki takes a seat knowing the drill, "Yeah," he says, "Yûko ALWAYS wants me to pass info, honestly I work for King Clow- not her. If she wants a servant for all her witchcraft she could just use that pet of hers, it certainly talks enough. . ." Watanuki groans.

Watanuki is the all around handyman to the King but had somehow got saddled to be the indentured servant to Yûko, the lazy ass 'Fairy Godmother' of the kingdom, and the kicker is that none of us, not even Watanuki-kun, knows how he got indentured in the first place.

Kakei smiles and waits patiently for him to continue. Kakei-san and Yûko are old friends and he knew that she was a challenge to deal with day in and day out. So he figured that Watanuki could use this time to blow off some steam. After another minute of grumbles Watanuki finally continues, "Anyway she thought it right to inform all of you that there is some serious crap going on at the castle like-"

"Like what?" Fai asks jumping down the last of the stairs and coming to a halt beside the table and throwing me my t-shirt, which I thankfully put on.

"Like the Prince- Rikuo, is going to be turning eighteen soon, and Kurogane's cousin, Tomoyo, is pressuring him to get married because she wants to make the suit and wedding dress."

"How's this new?" I ask confused. News of Tomoyo's pressuring had been circling for several years now.

"Well what if I told you that he's about to cave in?" Watanuki says, and Himawari-chan, Fai-kun, and I all gasp.

"Really?" Himawari-chan asks.

"Yep- he's finally at his wits end, so rumour has it that he'll be hosting a series of three balls. Two before and one on the day of his birthday and that everyone in the kingdom is invited to attend. It's said that he'll pick his spouse from that way." Watanuki said 'spouse' because the prince- although he appeared in public often- had never actually dated anyone from either sex, and therefore no one knew his preferences.

"So she finally got to him, did she?" Fai grins, "Kuro-pon's been saying that she's been wearing him down, but I didn't believe him. I guess it's because those two are the same in a way- tall, dark, handsome, and they don't speak much. . ." Fai starts to tap his chin in thought, "they'd be perfect for each other in that sense. . . but. . ." firm resolve touches his eyes, "I'm not gonna' let the prince take _my_ Kuro-strong. I saw and claimed him first- whether he agrees or not." suddenly he goes cheery again- just how it always is with him, "Oh! Speaking of Kuro-kuro, here!" Fai thrusts an envelope at Watanuki, "Take this to him, please~!"

Watanuki scowls and avoids the parcel, "I told you last time I was here- take it to him yourself."

"Awwww, _please_. . . I'd do it myself but he won't take it from meeeeee! You alllllllllllllways manage to get it to him, Watanuki-kun!"

"I said NO!"

Fai's eyes steel, just as they always do when he wants something to do with his long time crush Kurogane Suwa and isn't going to take 'no' for an answer, "Take it or I'll go find Domeki-kun."

Watanuki- who was starting to turn away, freezes in his movements, then whips back around to stare at Fai, "And why do you need that jerk?!".

"Because he'll agree to take it for me, and he'll probably do a better job of it too. Then I'll start circulating that Domeki-kun is _much_ better at your only remaining occupation set to you by the king, and all you'll have left to do is work for Yûko-san."

Watanuki is quiet for a minute- assessing Fai's threat, which by his standards is genuine.

"Fine." He seethes and snatches the letter from Fai, and sticks it in his pocket.

"Really~?" Fai brightens and you can almost see cat ears pop on his head, "Thank you, Watanuki-kun~!" he grins and gives the bespectacled boy a hug.

"Yeah, yeah." Watanuki wrenches himself away and stalks back to the front door, "I'll be back soon with more details!" he shouts as he exits the building, almost slamming the door behind him.

We're all quiet for a minute as we watch him leave.

"Well that was a pleasant visit." Kakei smiles happily, as if Fai hadn't just threatened Watanuki with utter humiliation.

I shake my head and slink back up the stairs to my room. The news of the prince was interesting to say the least. I'd never met Rikuo in person but I'd seen him from afar and heard him speak over the radio. Kakei, Saiga, and Fai were the only ones that had ever met him in person- Kakei and Saiga because of their connection with Yûko and King Clow, and Fai because he happened to be bugging Kurogane-san when he was at the castle and Rikuo walked by.

I have always wanted to meet him- what self respecting person _didn't_ want to meet the future ruler of their country, but I have a different reason. I want to know if his attitude matches his good looks.

Kakei-san figured it out long before I did- what kind of person that I went for, and sadly (?) I turned out more like my father in that respect.

Yep, I'm gay.

Though I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing, but I do know that being in a house surrounded by mostly homosexual people was not going to help me (if at all possible) change my ways.

But if Fai says that Rikuo and Kurogane Suwa are alike in most ways I wasn't getting my hopes up about his attitude being pleasant. Which was disappointment, but not really surprising- I mean, how often are princes the kind, loving, gentle people they are in the fairy tales that you read when you're young? It's like finding a needle in a stack of needles, or person in a busy grocery store- whatever that is. They play kind, but they're all self serving bastards that only care about politics- well, at least that's what Saiga's told me.

So there is no way in hell that _Prince_ Rikuo would ever even take _notice_ of a commoner like me.

Collapsing on my bed I groan into the pillows. _There is no way that I'm attending those balls. Not even if Kakei-san makes me!_

**"Now Kazahaya, we all know what's going to happen now, right?"**

***glumly replies because he's figured out that he's not getting out of this role* "I'm gonna' be forced to go to that party?"**

***evil grin* "You'll find out next time! I can't give plot spoilers before the chapters come out. But please review and tell me how I'm doing so far- and whether this is worthwhile to continue!"**

**Til next time!**

**I'll start uploading pictures soon!**


	3. The act of giving in

**Hey guys! Em her/back- though I never really left.**

**I had originally written a whole bunch here but I lost internet connection and lost my progress here so now I have to type it all over again Yeah, I'm not typing it over again.**

**Kazahaya is currently hiding from me and the dress I have for him in my closet and Rikuo just left the previous conversation I was having with him to go look for K-chan.**

**So you're stuck with me today.**

**Warning: Swearing. . . and since the Yaoi come in later chapters that's all that there is to warn about for now. . . I think- anyway I don't suggest reading this story without knowing what you're getting into- so if your resolve is wavering check out the first chapter again and make a decision.**

**Disclaimer: Ri-kun, K-chan, Kuro-sama, Tomoyo-hime, and all of CLAMP's other characters belong to CLAMP. Though since my birthday's coming up if anyone can get me the rights to them, or just track down Fai and K-chan, give them to me to hug and stick in my closet- because Kuro and Ri-kun will follow after, it would be greatly appreciated/ the best birthday gift EVER!**

**Another note: If you're a fan of Legal Drug/ Drug & Drop go and read the works by Yumi Kei (especially Skool Daze). She's a freaking GENIUS!**

**Read, REVIEW, and fangirl on!**

***from somewhere in the background Kazahaya yells* "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING K-CHAN?!"**

**Rikuo's POV**

It was taking all of my self control not to punch Tomoyo in the face. Her nagging had finally reached a point that if I wasn't a prince and a friend of Kurogane I would have done it already.

It's not as if people didn't know about my dislike for the topic, but Tomoyo just had the ability to ignore death glares and find you when you least wanted to see her- just like now.

"Rikuo, I've decided that the color of your suit will be black, because that color really fits you, and have a green dress shirt underneath it. And the color of the dress," I'm sitting in the large conference room that my father normally occupied when he had foreign diplomats over- but was empty at the time being, other than Tomoyo, Kurogane, and myself. This was the second time that she had tracked me down today, and I was already trying to keep control of my patience.

I sigh as she continues about the dress- something that excited her more than the fact that the kingdom _might_ have a new princess. "wellthedresswilldependonwhatcolorlooksbestonthebr ide,butI'mleaningmore towardasubtlecolorthatwillbringouthereyes- likemakethemgo'POP'sothateveryonewill notice,butitwon'toverpowerthemoment-"

She takes a pause to breathe and Kurogane, sensing my growing annoyance decides to intervene.

"Tomoyo, maybe you should wait until _after_ the prince decides to take a spouse before you go ahead and decide every outfit that you're ever going to make them before you drop dead of exhaustion." His tone expresses the annoyance that I feel and he glares at her, "In fact, you're looking like you close to the other side now, why don't you go find Sakura and get her to make you a nice sup of tea and take a nap for a few hours."

"But-" She starts to protest.

"No buts." Kurogane growls and she huffs indignance. Curtsying to me she stomps out of the room in search of the little maid- if just to dress her up in outlandish outfits.

I nod my thanks at Kurogane and he stands from where he was sitting on one of the tables.

"You know that you don't have to get married, right?" He asks me and I sigh.

"Of course. But her nagging doesn't make it any better. Yûko is taking her side too, and you know her- she gets what she wants or all hell breaks loose."

Kurogane smirks at this, "That witch is a lot like my cousin- they both don't take 'no' for an answer." his face suddenly morphs into a thoughtful frown, "You're not thinking of giving in are you?"

I glare at him, "Thinking of it- no. Being forced into it- possibly. The only ones opinion who I will take is the kings, and even he says that I should give the people the benefit of the doubt and just entertain guests for a couple of evenings. I don't think that I have much choice in this anymore."

I stand as well and head toward the door, "Still," Kurogane starts, "it's your life so you have the ultimate decision on who you fuck, love, get married to, have affairs with, or anything of that nature."

A bemused smile crosses my face as I pause in the doorway, "Like you have any room to talk. Your love life, or lack there of, is dictated by that bright blonde kid of Kakei's, if I do remember correctly. Fai- wasn't it?"

Kurogane hisses at me, a warning to stay out of that aspect of his life. It was obvious that the 'stupid mage' (wherever he got that from) he referred to was in absolute love with him- a blind person could tell you that, but what Fai didn't know is that Kurogane, while he might complain about him, had a slightly unhealthy obsession over the guy and looked forward to the letters and random visits that he sometimes paid to the castle.

I also know that if Fai was to find this out from me not even the act that I was a prince and a friend would stop Kurogane from chopping me to bits with his precious sword.

I grin and look out the door, "Oh look here comes Watanuki now. I wonder what news he has for us today."

Kurogane, still glaring at me, comes over to stand beside me. Watanuki, catching sight of us, jogs over to where we're standing.

"What is it today?" I ask him. Translation: What has Yûko sent you to do?

"Had to go down to Kakei-san's residence." He mumbles, "Here-" He forces a letter into Kurogane's hands, "Read it and send back a response with someone else. Fai-san is in a particularly evil mood today and I'm NOT loosing any pride, or job, I have left to the guy."

"How is Kakei's household doing?" I muse, eyebrows raised at Kurogane's slightly flushed face. I'd known Kakei for many years since he is one of my fathers most trusted advisers and an old friend of Yûko so I felt kind of obligated to ask about him and the people he lives with now and again.

"Kakei-san is doing well from the looks of it. I didn't see Saiga-san, but that just means that he was sleeping in one of backrooms." Watanuki's attitude suddenly picks up, "Himawari-chan looks as beautiful as ever and is still just as sweet~!" as suddenly as it was high Watanuki's mood plummets, "Fai-san is feeling evil but that might be because Kurogane won't visit or he didn't get a chance to dress up Kazahaya-kun. And well Kazahaya's feeling the same as always- bored, annoyed, and slightly under-dressed. I'm guessing that Fai-san tried to dress him up before I got there."

Kurogane smirks as I stare on confused, "Really? I thought that he'd finally excepted the fact that he can't escape those two."

Watanuki shrugs, "He's gotten better at escaping. This time he'd just lost his shirt."

"Should I even wonder what the hell you two are talking about?" I ask and they look at me like they had forgotten I was there.

"You really don't want to know." Kurogane says then sighs, "It's not of much importance."

"Any importance." Watanuki corrects and earns a glare from Kurogane, "You two wouldn't get along at all." he hurries to finish before Kurogane decided that it was time for him to disappear.

My brain starts to spin as a bell rings and Watanuki groans.

"Ugg. . . Yûko-san is calling. I have to go now." He bows to me and turns to leave. The bell rings again- louder this time and Watanuki stops and yells at the ceiling, "I'M COMING, I'M COMING!" and takes off at a run.

I shake my head and turn to walk in the other direction. Kurogane follows me and I usher for him to go find something else to do. He shrugs and takes the next corner we come across.

I stop at the window that gazes out over the main road to the castle. I'd never come face to face with this Kazahaya. I'd heard of him from Kakei or Kurogane or Watanuki but I'd never met him. His father had been a good friend of my father's as well (I guess that was why his father had hit it off so well with Kakei)- but that was really all I knew about the boy.

_I wonder what kind of guy lets himself get dressed up in weird outfits other than Sakura, buts she's a girl. I suppose that they're in colors that Tomoyo would fawn over- she'd probably love to make a suit for him- her and Fai get along well in that aspect. I should direct her to him and maybe she'll leave me alo-_

"Rikuo-sama?" Syaoran's voice brings me back to reality.

"Wha?" I ask quickly, turning to him.

"Um," He twists his hands and then gains a little confidence and looks at me, "is it true?"

"Is what true?" My eyebrows knit together in confusion.

It's Syaoran's turn to look confused, "Um, what Tomoyo-san is saying. That you're going to host three balls in order to find a bride?"

I have to bite my lip in order not to yell at him for something that he didn't do, "She's been telling people that?"

"Yeah, Sakura-hime told me that Tomoyo-san told her." 'Sakura-hime' was Syaoran's own name for Sakura, it expressed his 'fondness' for the girl without outright saying it.

"When did she do this?" I ask, head already in my hand.

"About fifteen minutes ago." Syaoran looks at me apprehensively.

"Did you not agree to it?" He asks tentatively.

"No I didn't." I sigh.

"Oh." He squirms as if under pressure, "I'm sorry. I'll just, um, go now." Syaoran bows and walks quickly in the other direction.

Sighing again I make a quick decision, "Syaoran!" he turns quickly.

"Yes sir?" He asks.

"Go find Watanuki and tell him to give Yûko a message."

"Yes sir. What would that be?"

"Tell her," I groan and then continue before my mind decides that I'm stupid and not to listen to my brain, "that I'd like her to send out a letter to every person in the kingdom and tell them I'm going to host the series of balls and that I _might_ pick the person that I'm going to marry out of them. And tell her that she and Tomoyo can work out the fine details."

Syaoran's eyes go wide, "Re- really? I- I mean yes sir! Right away."

"Good. Do that and then get back to the gardens, go on now."

Syaoran nods and runs off to deliver the message.

I lean against the wall and place my hand back on my head.

_Oh god, what the hell did I just do?_

I quickly escape to my room, locking the door behind me. Sitting in one of the chairs in there I only have to wait a few minutes before I hear Tomoyo's squeal of delight as Yûko tells her my decision. It was so loud in fact that I'm pretty sure that half the kingdom heard her.

"Shit." I swear, "Really, what the hell did I just fucking do?"

**I hope you guys enjoyed it! I'll be posting pictures up soon of Kazahaya in dresses- I promise! And a quick note- if you haven't read the Brother's Grimm version of Cinderella I suggest you find a copy, because if you've only seen the Disney version you might become very confused (not that I'm really going to follow the storyline, but still-).**

**If you like anything that might be related to fairy tales check out my Kurofai fic, ****_But Fairy Tales Never Come True. _**

**Until next time!**

**(I hope that you're happy Baka-chan, and I'll probably update the next chapter tomorrow)**


	4. Mother card

**"Em, here! This is the next Chapter of FIW, if you haven't figured that out already- and if you want a hint to what this chapter happens to be about go and check out the ending authors note to chapter 2-"**

**"Noooo! REALLY!"**

**"For anyone that was curious the one that just yelled to the heavens was my trusty sidekick Kazahaya, and sitting beside him, since you can't see either of them, is his savour Rikuo. Now why don't you two in-"**

**"Who are you calling savour!" Kazahaya yells.**

**"Well he always shows up when you're in danger to help you so-"**

***Rikuo evil grins* "Yeah, ****_K-chan_****."**

**". . ."**

**"Ladies and possible gentlemen, Kazahaya is now too stunned to speak. Ri-kun would you please tell our viewers all the other stuff that they need to know."**

***sighs* "Fine. . ."**

**"The warning is that this contains swearing, interruptions by god, and spazing by Kazahaya." *muffled yelling of indignace from K-chan in background***

**"The disclaimer is that Vance here, owns none of us and that CLAMP has all rights, and that us much as she might want to keep us in her. . . closet? She knows she can't until she manages to. . . kidnap us? What the hell?"**

**"Yep!" I grin, "Read, review, and fangirl on!"**

**Narrator**

And so after much discussion in between the two masterminds invitations were sent out to every person in the kingdom- especially those close to Rikuo's age. So inevitably some ended up at Kazahaya's front door- delivered by the king's footman, Domeki. And as you could probably imagine Kazahaya was not the happiest person that day- unlike most of the eligible girls in the rest of the kingdom.

**Kazahaya's POV**

"NOT HAPPENING!" I almost screech, moving farther back onto my bed as Kakei-san sits in a chair across from me.

"Oh, come on, Kazahaya-kun. It's not that bad."

"Yes, yes it is!" I glare at him, "I don't want to go in the first place, and I'm NOT letting _those two_ dress me up for it."

Kakei had come up to tell me that the letters had come from the castle- three hours after we'd been shocked by loud, echoy, squealing from the royals general direction. Fai had already done his share of hysterical giggling, saying something about seeing 'Kuro-shy' and having to pick out the right outfit to impress him. Himawari had been happy with him, and she was finding this to be a great excuse to try out some of the new dresses that Fai had made for her. It was just like them to get more excited about another guy and clothes- it made me completely glad not to be related to them by blood (not that those two are related by blood, it's just the way that they act would make you think).

Now Kakei was trying to convince me to leave my room at some point in time during the next three weeks- and it honestly wasn't going too well on his part.

"Why not?" He asks cheerfully, "It'll be fun."

"Then you need a new definition of 'fun'." I hiss at him. The ball was in two weeks and if I got my way it would be Kazahaya free.

I never expected Kakei to use his 'god' card.

Kakei's face steels and he leans forward in his seat.

"You're going to the balls Kazahaya." His tone left no room for argument, but I argued anyway- a stupid decision on my part.

"No. No, I'm not." I counter against better sense.

"Yes. You. Are. I'm your 'mother' and if I say you're going then you are. I _won't _accept and opposition on this matter and if you continue to fight it I'm going to have Saiga come up here and drag you down the hall to your siblings and duct tape you to a chair."

Okay, so technically it was the mother card, but anyone with any common sense could tell you that the position of mother means god- or at least the overruling dictator.

My eyes go wide- like a cats as Fai likes to tease me, and shiver runs down my spine, _at least I know where Fai learned to be scary_.

"So are you going to castle with us Kazahaya-kun?" Kakei suddenly starts talking in a happy/cheerful voice that scares me more than his threats.

I gulp, "Yes sir."

Kakei smiles, "That's wonderful! I'll send back our RSVP's when Watanuki-kun comes in about an hour. Meanwhile, I'll tell Fai-kun that you've decided to attend. He and Himawari-chan will be so happy," Kakei gets up and walks over to the door, "Oh, and Kazahaya-kun!"

"Yes." I sigh in utter defeat.

"I'd still like it if you called me 'mother'." And with that he leaves the room.

After a minute I allow my back to hit the bed with a 'whumph', "Aggh. . ." I groan and then cover my face with my pillow.

"God damn you, Kakei!" I mutter, but it comes out as muffled jumbled words.

I think I finally manage to doze off when Fai comes into my room and bounces next to me on the bed- waking me with a start.

"Kazzzzzzzahaaaaaaaayyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaa-kuuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuun~!" Fai sings and I throw my pillow at him.

"What the hell do you want Fai?" I mumble, rubbing my eyes.

"Kakei-san said that you're going to come to the balls with us!" He bounces excitedly and doesn't wait for my answer before he pulls me up and drags me down the hall into his 'studio'- really it's just an extra storage room that he converted into a place for him to sew. Saiga used it frequently as well and often helped Fai make most of his clothes.

"And I have to get a start on your new dresses!" He opens the door, "Good Saiga-san you're here!"

"Yep." The large man salutes and Fai pushes me over to him.

"If you'd be so kind as to take his measurements I'll be able to start on the clothes by the end of the day!" Fai grins and slams the door in my stunned face.

"Wait!" I cry and pull at the door, which he had thoughtfully managed to lock from the outside.

"Too late kiddo." Saiga tells me and grabs a measuring tape.

I sigh. My pride was slowly going down the drain, "Did I even have a choice to begin with? The narrator already cryptically said that I can't do anything about it. . ." I grumble under my breath.

_**"Yep, you're stuck like this Kazahaya. Get used to it- you can't fight fate, or your narrator!"**_ Comes the almost booming voice of the real god above my head. I turn my head back and forth staring at the ceiling.

"Did you hear that?" I ask Saiga.

"Hmm? Hear what?" He questions.

"Great now I'm hearing things. . ." I breathe, glaring at the ceiling before turning my attention back to Saiga.

"I'm gonna' get you guys back for this." I mutter louder as I hold my arms up so Saiga can start.

"Sure, sure." Saiga grins.

_Dammit. They're gonna' force me to make a fool of myself in front of most of the kingdom, and the royals no less. I might as well just shoot myself in the head and save my self from the embarrassment. Uggg. . . this is going to ruin whatever manhood I have left._

"Done kiddo." Saiga tells me and Fai unlocks the door, prancing in with his excitement.

"You can go now Kazahaya-kun!" He tells me and I bolt down the stairs- grabbing my shoes I hurriedly stick them on and open the door, almost running into Watanuki-kun who had his hand poised at the door- about to knock on it.

"He- hello Kazahaya-kun." He stutters. I mumble my own greeting and push pass him.

"Where are you going?" He calls as I hit the road.

"A WALK!" I shout back and march angerly to my unknown destination.

**"I hope that you guys enjoyed that! I felt really happy after I wrote this and already have an idea for my next chapter. I was gonna' put in links to the pictures, but then decided that I'll wait until we get to those chapters. . . but I'm pretty sure that you're going to love the dresses! So in closing why don't Ri-kun and K-chan do something for us!"**

**"What the hell are you talking about?" Kazahaya hisses.**

**"Why don't you guys KISS?!" I squeal.**

***Kazahaya blushes and Rikuo smirks. Rikuo pulls Kazahaya close to him and gives him a quick peck on the lips.***

**"WHAAA?!" Kazahya pulls away from Rikuo and storms off.**

**Rikuo grins and shrugs, "I don't know what he's complaining about. They write about worse on this site."**

**I sigh, "Yeah, but he's Kazahaya so. . . anyway, until next time!"**


	5. Purposefully Misinterpreted

**Hi guys! It's Em, I'm back! Not that I was ever really gone, I've just had a ton of homework and haven't had time to post. . . **

**Screw that. Sorry guys, that was a lie. While yes, I have had homework I have also had time to write. My problem? I'm a terrible procrastinator and although I've drawn the pictures of K-chan in a dress (that will be unveiled in the next chapter because that's when the balls ****_finally_**** start) I just have not gained the motivation to scan them into my computer. . . yes I'm lazy, sorry.**

**But I'm posting this chapter, I'm finally 16, Pandora Hearts updated (and that's what I've been reading lately), I got the 3 Legal Drug books for my birthday, and both of the Moko-chan's decided to grant my household their presence! So all in all, life is good and I want to write a lot more FF and then post it.**

**I have a couple of Kurofai things I need to finish and post and I'm also working on a Hikaoru fic as well. Not to mention I'm still working on Ryu Prologue and I want to write a Pandora Hearts FF.**

**With all that's going on, how can you blame me for being unmotivated? XP**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

**Read, Review, and fangirl on!**

**Rikuo's POV**

It was getting late and I decided that I had enough of Tomoyo following me around all the halls and even into my room- trying to take new measurements and tell me about themes for the dances, and excused myself out the servants entrance of the castle.

"At least dusk hasn't fallen." I say to no one in particular as I walk down one of the back roads and into the small little forest off to my right. It wouldn't be too long before Kurogane came looking for me- not that he liked to come find me after I'd gone through the trouble to leave, seeing as he knows that I like my personal space, but it was his job to guard me, seeing that was what he was assigned to do.

I hasten my stride and delve deeper into the small forest. _It's nice to get away from Tomoyo's constant nagging and the approving glances from the female servants. Geez, this was a really bad idea. Why the hell did I allow myself to be pulled into Yûko's scam? I suppose I could always ask Kakei about it, but he'd probably direct me right back to our 'fairy godmother'- and she'll say that everything is Hitsuzen, or something along those lines. Honestly, I only ever wanted her help to find-_

"AGGHHH!" Breaks my train of thought and I jump at the strange noise. Moving quicker through the trees I come across the clearing with a small, but deep, lake. At the edge of the lake, trying to skip rocks on the water but not particularly trying at the same time is a boy with dirty blonde hair.

"I can't fight against him, I can't fight against god, HELL, I can't even fight against the narrator! WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THEN? LIE DOWN LIKE A DOG AND ACCEPT MY PUNISHMENT? WHAT THE FUCKING HELL DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME?!"

The boy picks up and throws another rock into the water with such a force that he begins to topple over. Crashing into the blue liquid he gasps and I stare at where his body had been.

After a moment of him not coming to the surface I rush forward and dive into the water after him. _Shit, this guy is stupid enough to let himself drown!_

Grabbing his form I drag him to the surface and throw him on the bank, crawling up beside him.

Kneeling over him I press hard against his chest- forcing water up and air into his lungs. The boy's eyes snap open and he juts to a sitting position- coughing and spluttering, water hitting the ground from his mouth. I stare at him as this happens and after a minute he looks over at me.

His eyes go wide and he jumps backwards- yowling like a drowned cat, which I suppose is what he looked like. His clothes and hair are dripping wet and his eyes are huge like a cats. I could even imagine him with fangs and claws.

_He's feline?_ My mind questions, while my mouth says differently, "Is that how you treat someone who's saved your life?" I ask, eyebrows raising.

"Ah- ah. . ." His eyes glaze over with confusion and then he notices the fact that I'm soaked to the bone.

"I guess it doesn't matter though." I sigh and get to my feet- extending my hand for him to grab so he can hoist himself up. He looks at it strangely and then cautiously takes it, "Though I do have to wonder something. If you can't swim why were you stupid enough to fall in the lake?" I shake my head in slight confusion.

The boy glares at me, "I didn't mean to fall in the lake, asshole, it was an accid-" suddenly he goes rigid and curses under his breath, and then rephrases, "I didn't mean to fall into the lake, I just lost my balance." this time it was more polite and I look at him strangely.

"So you just look like a cat- there are no 'cat-like' reflexes involved, huh?"

His face goes bight red and he explodes, "WHAT WAS THAT YOU ASSHOLE?! DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST CALL ME A _CAT_?! I WAS TRYING TO BE NICE AND THIS IS WHAT I GET?! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU A-" he cuts himself off suddenly, and bites his lip.

It's pretty obvious by his face that he knows exactly who I am, but that apparently didn't stop him from blowing up in my face.

I smirk, "Oh come on," I say, now beginning to tease, "don't stop there. What were you going to say?"

"I was right," The boy growls, still glaring at me, "you are a complete dick."

"But you barely even know me." I comment, watching his slowly drying hair start to stand on end, _yep a cat_, "Don't go pressuring me with any sexual advances until we're properly acquainted."

His eyes almost pop out of his head, "WHAT?!"

"You needn't be ashamed," I grin, "I just don't decide to date anyone that I haven't gotten to know first. So let's start with your name."

"I'M NOT MAKING ANY S- SEXUAL AD- ADVANCES TOWARD YOU, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! AND I'M NOT TELLING YOU MY NAME EITHER!" He roars and I grin louder.

"Sure, sure." I shrug.

He presses his lips together and his hands turn into fists at his side, "Wh- why. . . aren't y- you at. . . the cas- castle, Y-. . . Your. . . Majesty?" the words are spoken through his teeth, his body is shaking with anger, and he's making an obvious effort not to throw a punch at my head.

"Because I needed a break, and why would I want to be up there when I being down here is so much more interesting?" I smirk and my answer catches him by surprise.

"But I do suppose," I start, turning my back to him, "that I should get back before the send Kurogane after me." I begin to walk and wave my hand in a sort of dismissal goodbye gesture, "Try not to get yourself into anymore trouble on your way home. I won't be there to save you this time." I look over my shoulder slightly and smirk at him again before disappearing back into the trees.

As I go I hear a loud yell form behind me, "LIKE HELL I'LL NEED YOUR HELP AGAIN, JERK!" and I let out a short laugh at that.

I run into Kurogane on the main road.

"Having fun." He states from the smirk still on my lips.

"Sort of." I reply, "I just met someone _very_ interesting."

We head back to the castle, Kurogane shaking his head- wanting to know who, but not really caring enough to ask. _That's fine,_ I think, _I never got his name anyway._

**Kazahaya's POV**

"THAT JERK!" I scream into my pillow. After getting saved by Prince freaking _Rikuo_ in the woods I had stalked back home, ignored Himawari-chan's questions as to why I was soaked, changed clothes and then proceeded to beat my pillow into different forms before burying my face into it.

_How the hell did I ever think that I could like someone like HIM? I mean yes, he's good looking and I did notice a pull of attraction, bust seriously WHY HIM? His personality sucks and he called me a cat! He called me a fucking CAT! Fai has said that I resemble one before, but no one has outright told me that before! Can he get anymore insensitive! DAMMIT I WISH I WASN'T FORCED INTO GOING TO THOSE STUPID FUCKING DANCES!_

**"Heheh. . . sorry Kazahaya, but you're not getting out of this one. . ." *Evil laughing/grinning***

**"Oh!" *Brightens up* "I also converted one of my friends to yaoi! I win at life!" *grins again* "Anyway, see you next time!"**


End file.
